MARCH 2010 HORSES

6 year old chesnut gelding     ( Riviera – Miss Marple)     05

Those who take notice of horse names will have spotted that Clouseau is fairly well named for his dam and sire, and is not necessarily just a clumsy oaf blundering from one misfortune to another. The pedantic may wish to highlight the tenuous connection between the legendary Chief Inspector and the Riviera , but perhaps the name works because both ways of thinking apply? In fairness, he is from New Zealand , and when the perspective is from that far away, Paris and the south of France do look quite close together. And another balanced observation is that there have been no absurd accidents in his two hurdle runs. The first run was either not off, not go on the fast ground or not ready for the run – there are hints of each. The second one, an eight length fifth to Tito Bustillo, was a big improvement as a first impression and hindsight shows that the form is working out to be very solid. Although it is unlikely to happen, it would be a commentator’s dream should he ever run against Kauto Star, and even those that do not pronounce it Kay-toe would surely be prepared to compromise.

Hurdle races up to 2m 4f, not on good to firm/firm

CONSTANT CUPID     (Graeme P. McPherson)

6 year old bay gelding     (Winged Love – Eva Ross)     -07

It was one of those “you had to see it” moments, as the form book kind of under-estimates the chain of events. For his last run, at Lingfield, Constant Cupid, whose previous exploits involved pulling up in three point-to-points and going under by forty-nine lengths in a bumper, was making a rather encouraging first effort over hurdles, with a visor worn that was not used in the bumper. Alas for connections, but less worrying for the rest of the world, who would have had no real reason to be supporting him, the favourite slipped up on the final turn and almost took Constant Cupid down as well, resulting in the selection coming to a near stop in conditions far too muddy to recover from the hindrance. Assuming that he had lasted home, a creditable top five finish was on the cards and it showed enough to think that a low grade handicap hurdle or two could be reason for us to get very affectionate towards him. The limited evidence so far suggests that shorter distances are worthy of concentrating his attention upon.

Handicap hurdles up to Class 5, up to 2m 4f, with headgear

I’M YOUR MAN     (Mrs. E. Slack)

11 year old grey gelding     (Bigstone – Snowgirl)     55/46664/049PPP/2141142/07026/UP653312F433549U2B7-175597165312

There are a lot of numbers to be thinking about with I’m Your Man, and a few letters but perhaps not as many of them as might be expected for a low level performer that visits the racetrack with such frequency. The other thing that has counted against his strike rate is a consistent desire to try three miles, which he clearly gives the impression should be ideal, but the evidence of history shows that to be a very false impression. Whack I’m Your Man onto an undulating track in a big field, and suddenly he becomes very punter friendly indeed. Five wins from twenty four starts is an adequate rate of winning, but due to the number of occasions that he is defeated, the level stakes profit from that is 25 points. His handicap mark after a couple of recent wins is a bit on the high side, but the handicapper has historically been quite volatile in assessing him, so that could come down fairly quickly, even though there has been no diminishing of performance when things are set up right for him.

Races on an undulating track, ten or more runners, up to 2m 7f, rated up to 105

INTHEJUNGLE     (D. C. O’Brien)

7 year old chesnut gelding     (Bob Back – Whizz)     0//0-3

The sparse British form figures are misleading for Inthejungle, for he has raced more often en France , all in the typically non-jungly environs of Paris. Or is it unjungly? Or jungless? Along the way he bumpered at Newbury (10^th of 17), handicap hurdled at Kempton (13^th of 15, but beaten only 18 lengths) and beginners’ chased at Plumpton – probably his first real experience of being consigned to the wilderness – UK-Jumping is planning a visit to Fontainebleau this year and will report if this is inaccurate. Outclassed by Tanks For That and Bormo, he was not disgraced in being third, a position which was accepted a long way out, and having proved a safe conveyance, some form of handicap effort should be on the cards, bearing in mind that he also had the experience of a couple of chases runs in France. Hurdle form suggests that the minimum trip encountered at Plumpton may not have been optimal.

Handicap chases between 2m 3f and 2m 6f, rated up to 120

Inthejungle en route to victory at Plumpton

MOKUM      (A. W. Carroll)

9 year old bay gelding     (Octagonal – Back On Top)     5775486235/7076707U12/FP413233/7P3411FP2/0P642-6

Despite suffering the fate of having a name that sounds like the band of a third rate country singer, Mokum has proved that he has an ability to rise above that insult and win some races. This is something he does especially willingly when he is going right-handed (being left handed is illegal in country music) and when carrying less than eleven stone in the race – here he deviates from the country theme, by an aversion to stoically enduring excessive burdens in life. In the conditions mentioned, Mokum has gone U1123411. The two runs where he did not fare so well are the unseated and the second place, coincidentally (or perhaps not) his only tries on soft or heavy ground. With such sparse evidence, ignoring him on these goings may be premature, but as with anything to do with U2, expect frustration and annoyance before seeing any signs of encouragement or entertainment. The earlier wins were at two and a half miles, but Mokum looks to have grown into a resolute stayer these days.

Races on a right handed track, carrying 11 stone or less

SIOUXME      (Mrs. A. M. Batchelor)

8 year old bay mare     (Little Bighorn - Winter Sunset)     54P

Rather like the earlier selection Inthejungle, there is a bit more to Siouxme than the numbers tell, as she did have a handful of point-to-point runs prior to switching to Rules, and she did even manage a win and a second amongst them, which is a little brighter display than the impression that recent efforts give. She got a drubbing on her debut, forty-six lengths behind Evella, and not satisfied with that, took a drubbing and a half at the hands of Sure Josie Sure next time. Oddly, the pulled up at Towcester was a very quick reappearance, and smacked of trying to nab a handicap mark before something foolish happened to ruin it. The race that generates the highest possible mark for Siouxme is the first, from which 85 would be reasonable, and having seemed as if she is not entirely at ease on soft ground, the arrival of better ground is likely to make a difference. With her pointing experience, a quick switch to chases would not be a surprise either.

Handicap hurdles or chases, over 2m 5f or more, rated up to 100

The rather chunky mare that is Siouxme works through her own stretching regime prior to a race at Plumpton